As I spun through my Twitter feed tonight I noticed a tweet from a radio personality, telling his 8,000 followers to “follow this person, you won’t regret it,” and linking to an attractive member of the media. So I clicked on it. And half of her retweets were people telling her how pretty she was or how hot she was or how gorgeous she looked.
That’s how you value your worth? Not by how good you are at what you do but how good people think you look? And, clearly, his post implied that the only reason to follow her was because of how she looked.
Aren’t we bigger than this?
No, we’re not.
A former member of the local media put her entire worth into how she looked – and parlayed it into how she worked. It spoke poorly of her decision-making in relation to something that she had a lot of potential at. Instead of doing her job the right way, she did it the easy way and the unethical way. Instead of gaining respect for the work she did and how she proved herself, it created a perception that she instead flaunted herself to get an inside track.
Then I stumbled upon a post on a message board discussing women and “press box hot.”
“Well,” I thought, “that ship sailed long ago.”
However, a former classmate put it very well: “Men see you through a prism of attractiveness and biology, and that determines your initial worth to them.” ‘
Kindness, inquisitiveness and a psychological connection clearly come later.
When I first met a former coworker, the look that registered on his face told me everything: he was clearly and extremely disappointed that I wasn’t a hot 27-year-old.
We grew to respect each other, but I knew that the fact I didn’t appeal to him on a physical plane likely strained the efforts I made as a coworker to form a relationship with him.
But it’s true – and sad – that attractiveness is a currency. Hell, I was skewered on a message board because my online head shot was deemed “gross.”
At least they weren’t questioning my credibility as a reporter.